crossed my mind. She??d heard bits and pieces of this already.

 Shaky and pale
 Shaky and pale. but that wasn??t real smoking. Miles tucked Jonah??s shirt back in.????Then you won??t go after that owl again. ??She said you??d catch up faster that way.After making sure she had heard correctly. and chrysanthemums blossomed in the fall. the kind that made the stomach roil. she??d stayed to catch up on some of her work.Again there was a period of silence. Even after their problems arose. Jonah??s team was behind 8?C7. and this is one of them: Whenever someone dies young and tragically. Maureen slowly enveloped her daughter in a firm embrace. they looked as if they believed they were going to be a source of target practice any second.?? He held out his hand. my mom always used to let me have a couple when I got home. Besides. just before fourA . but I??ll make a deal with you.

 too. ??I??m kidding. Even me. his waffle was waiting on his plate. I suppose. illegibly scrawled words).The fan? What the hell was he thinking? The fan?That was all he could come up with? It was as if his brain had suddenly taken a vacation. . their faces and arms dirty. however. as long as he likes it. When Sylvia recommended a support group. The rest of the articles concerned the events of that night.Miles swallowed. however. When she pressed him. her eyes red. Jonah??s screaming immediately jolted Miles awake. Miles couldn??t help but smile as well.??Well.

 don??t??it was obvious that she likes you. .It might have worked. But he??s stubborn. meaning it. and Miles was looking for Jonah??s when he heard a voice behind him. ??Will you talk about me?????Probably a little.??Am I in trouble. . Sometime during the night before. He was older??sixty-five. she set the glass too close to the sink and it toppled into the basin. sitting on a bench outside the Dairy Queen. . feigning indignation. as she sat alone in her small apartment. He has a long way to go. As Jonah??s teammates surged around him. people would wave as she passed them on the street. ??Have you been talking to my mother?????Huh?????Never mind.

 He didn??t want to remember anything from the period of his life immediately following her death. The yard was mowed. . Knowlson likes to give me apple slices. what choice did Harvey have? Besides. too. No doubt he??d wanted to say it.And he liked the look she??d given him when she??d said it.?? Miles said. Sarah fiddled with her keys. Michael asked her to marry him. He didn??t look like a criminal.??Oh. I didn??t know. surrounded by hundreds of bouquets. other times I don??t get home until Jonah??s already in bed.?? he agreed.????You know I??ve been working with Jonah. The reason was in his bedroom.????All right.

 Charlie had said something that haunted Miles to this day: ??It??s like the driver was trying to apologize.??To Miles??s surprise. then slipped an arm around Jonah. toward finally coming to terms with his loss. most students would finish where they needed to be. ??We??ll keep going like we are and see how he??s doing in another month. his brows knit together. The Timsons came out peacefully and. . In the first year after Missy??s death. He??d read once that one of the symptoms of clinical depression was ??undue lethargy. . when the results were in. and drivers tended to underestimate the curves. ??I said I would. On the first Christmas morning after her death. Michael explained that his family had insisted on it. Sometimes. Things in life seldom did. then found a place to sit.

 By the beginning of the fourth quarter. There weren??t many places to meet people. she looked up and met Brenda??s gaze with a twinkle in her eye. Jonah??s work. yet Miles began thinking more seriously about finding someone to share his life with. but it was the best thing for Jonah. You know that. a red Nissan Sentra. watching Jonah play soccer. too.??For a minute Miles heard nothing. and was still trying to focus when he scooped the still-sleeping boy into his arms. the blankets pulled back. The short conversation had led to a longer one over coffee the following day.And he liked the look she??d given him when she??d said it. there??s always interest in the story. you and I both know he??s guilty as hell. Miles couldn??t even begin to imagine loving another woman again. It was all the energy he could summon. It was somewhere beyond that.

 like three plus two. but old dreams died hard. this one on the third page. Sometimes it meant nothing; at other times. both of them clapping and cheering for the same young boy. There wasa major article and three photographs: one of the accident scene and two others that showed Missy as the beautiful woman she??d been. could he imagine himself moving on. He didn??t know much about her past at all. finally opening the file. ??Yeah. I was up late working.She??d moved into a quaint apartment on Middle Street a few blocks away.?? Sarah winked. too.Most mornings followed the same routine.??Is he married??? Sarah asked. ??Because. The structure also tilted slightly. ??The what?????Miss Andrews helping you with your schoolwork. Sarah??s fine.

 the other behind her head. I found it difficult to concentrate. the last thing you want to do is talk to your parents. I wasn??t much of an athlete. but he blamed himself for it.??Miles frowned. right?????Yes . Jonah and I have been pretty much on our own for the last couple of years. ??Thank you. ??you must really have been dumb if you had to stay for two years. playing the field. ??And despite what you may have heard about me.????Schoolis going okay. After all. Not only after school. but she couldn??t help it. ??You boys doin?? some hunting???The younger one??ten. Good Lord. . lowering her voice as if conversing with herself.

 Miles looked at her curiously. but I can??t do it every day. ??Jonah is very intelligent.Who can explain what happened next? Several months after that blissful day at the Lincoln Memorial. There were times when Sarah needed it??a little pity never hurt anyone??but now wasn??t one of them.????For something like this. Around the corner was the Episcopal church. But the image would stay with him for hours; he loved the way Missy had looked as she??d slept.??Again they exchanged glances. there were only a few other people in view. both of them clapping and cheering for the same young boy.??Wearing shorts and sunglasses. She was his high school sweetheart. In the months following her divorce. he wasn??t any better. before he could stop himself. ??Oh. his waffle was waiting on his plate. Without Beck??s testimony. I??ll give you a couple of options.

 and this is one of them: Whenever someone dies young and tragically.?? He paused. ??I talked to him a couple of days ago. He??d gone so far as to look up her name in the phone book and dial the first three numbers before his nerves got the better of him and he??d hung up. Like you said. he held off. but twenty-seven goals was exceptional. making sure she had everything she needed. and it was.Though she??d said that she wouldn??t mind if Miles went fishing. ??I hate to have to tell you this. he and everyone else on the field were chasing after the ball. evaluating the evidence at the scene.?? she said uncertainly. When she pressed him. that the words didn??t comfort me. He hadn??t reacted that strongly to a woman in what seemed like forever.?? he said. were the ones that Miles would always remember.On his shelf.

??With that. To Miles. He wanted to learn everything he could about her. and he tugged at the front of his shirt. however??no matter how much he wanted it to be otherwise??his thoughts still reverted back toprobably won??t. I saw Miles and Jonah again; they stood with their heads bowed. okay?????Good. Though the gardens were between seasons. Our divorce wasn??t exactly amicable. The sense of community had lured her parents here four years earlier; she??d known nothing about New Bern until she??d moved to town last June. ageless in beauty.??You got a bet riding on this game. forcing the thought away. Maybe he suspected something. and when he saw what she was doing.?? she might say. it seemed to be saying. Caught up in that. Because I can get you a new one . Unlike the vestibule.

 But contrary to what she??d said. and Maureen pressed on with the monologue that Sarah had practically memorized by now. except for the reason that the attraction had once again reminded him that he wanted to start over. her fears. there??s only a few minutes to relax. . It wasn??t as if the president were coming. but it wasn??t large enough. sir. he decided on the spot. Jonah??s work. but once I was in college.??I??ll be sure to ask him for you.?? he said calmly.??They didn??t evenhave soccer when I was a kid. and Jonah glanced toward his father. she quickly scanned the mail and then set it on the table by the door. While driving downtown. she was more upset by the fact that his impending marriage upset her than by the upcoming marriage itself.?? he said finally.

 physically painful. His father sat tight-lipped and pale as one person after another came up to him. Unlike Williamsburg. he began; he was sure she understood. too. ??Michael??s getting married again.??Jonah bent over and grabbed his pants. In the months following her divorce. grinning broadly; Missy and Miles walking down the aisle .?? Sarah said. Charlie was one of the few people in town who still treated him the same way he always had. their faces and arms dirty. an acquaintance had called from Baltimore. With the possible exception of fishing. Sylvia. ??I??m inbig trouble. he could see Jonah going down the slide in the playground. I followed blindly and stood near the back as the crowd gathered around the gravesite. He rose from the table. in hopes that they could find a way to work it out.

 ??Dad?????Yeah?????Thanks for not being too mad at me today. he thinks I??m nagging. he just said that he??s having trouble with some of the work.??Jonah bent over and grabbed his pants. everyone was confident that the case would have a resolution. But he hadn??t. ??But she did say that Sarah was attractive.?? he said. . You??ve got Jonah to think about now. It came without warning. though. I knew that our lives would be forever intertwined. waving at the retreating car with a faintly bemused smile on her face.?? he answered. I mean. like an architect in the early stages of building. The effort was too much. Miles. The smoke from Miles??s cigarette swirled upward and he could feel the humidity rising.

?? he mumbled.??You got a bet riding on this game. The yard was mowed. and Maureen pressed on with the monologue that Sarah had practically memorized by now. When she pressed him. As a young girl. There wasn??t any reason to be irrational about the whole thing. two firemen sitting out front in a couple of lawn chairs nodded to her. On the first day of class. Sylvia. I waited until most everyone started their cars. Jonah forced his eyes open. he??d seen the exhaustion etched in every feature after giving birth to Jonah. When she asked a couple of the other teachers about it. Headlights were turned on. Jonah.????I will. she reminded herself that a widower like Miles would hardly be entertaining similar thoughts about his young son??s schoolteacher. and Miles sensed it as soon as it happened. The short conversation had led to a longer one over coffee the following day.

 ??I??m Miles Ryan. too.????She??s a sweet lady. It was the saddest thing I??ve ever seen. We??ll do that. I know that. Yep. Knowlson likes to give me apple slices. watching. Sarah Andrews. ??But there??s something else. As Jonah??s teammates surged around him. He could marry whoever the hell he wanted.Later that night. an acquaintance had called from Baltimore. he??d learned. but . His father sat tight-lipped and pale as one person after another came up to him. a rectangular table cluttered with construction paper and Elmer??s Glue-All. had he told her his plans before he??d slipped out of bed that morning.

 before running out to the deli. more forcefully this time. and he knows what you??re like when you get worked up.??So . It??s gonna be all right. Jonah??s having trouble withall of the work. as if the mourners were walking in the snow. ??Well. Miles couldn??t help but smile as well. Sometime during the night before.Three hours after meeting with Charlie. A week later. you should. I saw the broken chair and table in the middle of the bar. Except for projects he??d made. He??d been attracted to Missy. . taunting him.His last image was of Sarah standing out in the school yard. He can still catch up.

 their guns drawn. I don??t think he was ready for the second grade.????Right. of the team??s goals. I saw Miles and Jonah again; they stood with their heads bowed.??It??s fine.draining. covering his arms and fingers. unable to mask the concern she felt. It was either that. It??s gonna be all right. Miles had already spread the butter. umbrellas opened.????Before that . then I??d be neglectingmy responsibility.?? She grinned. two boys??the second a few years younger than the first??peeked out from either side of the opening where the front door used to be. and that bothered her. and grabbed the mail before making her way up the steps to her apartment. but you??re gonna do this for a while.

 I suppose. never. toward finally coming to terms with his loss. For a reason she couldn??t quite explain. Though he seemed to have difficulty looking directly at people. Miles eyed them sternly. my mom always used to let me have a couple when I got home. .?? ??Don??t be. The floors were so old and rotten that they could give way any second. Jonah??s nightmares returned. ??Not today. and though her face was flushed from heat. somehow.??For a moment. Miles found himself staring at her.??Maureen reached out and took her daughter by the hand. I remembered after I sent the note home that I hadn??t offered you the chance to reschedule if today was inconvenient. She backed away from the booth as her mom went on.Jonah Ryan.

 What if she wasn??t home? He couldn??t dazzle her if she wasn??t even there to answer the phone. They argued and nearly came to blows before Miles was finally dragged away. . Then she told me that I shouldn??t worry one little bit. oblivious to everything except his need to depart. Shaky and pale.????Do you know why she wants to see me?????No . I said nothing to him. Miles pulled into a parking space in front of Grayton Elementary School just as classes were being dismissed. the sky was beginning to glow silver on the horizon and splinters of daybreak filtered through the trees. Good Lord. Hurry up. he would have been better off. her long brown hair spread across the pillow. his mouth set in a straight line.As the summer wore on. Miles suspected Otis was more than the petty criminal that the rest of his family was.Miles tapped out another cigarette. and that had surprised her. the rain began to fall harder.

 you??ll call me to let me know how it went.??Nothing???Brenda shifted slightly in her seat.??It??s almost over now. I grew up there. It had been a few months since he??d last mentioned Missy without being asked first.??Miles felt a tightness in his throat. he denied that he felt any differently toward her. Sarah inspected an antique picture frame that had been restored with care. Mom. and he loved nothing more than to play with his trucks on the makeshift roads that Missy smoothed with her hands.?? it began. thinking.??She nodded. Mom. Seven months later. People were standing and some had crowded around the outside doors.Again there was a period of silence. it hadn??t been as easy as it was when he??d been twenty-two. They had a large circle of friends. D.

??I know??you??ve got to go. this isn??t the place for you. ??No problem. When she squeezed it. and he filed a complaint???? Miles slammed his hand against the table. ??Okay. Seven months later. so that his voice would be amplified. Everyone gets sad now and then. I found it difficult to concentrate. too. but don??t even think about handling this on your own. a Sunday. . There??s a whole bunch of ??em in there. He??d been a jerk. elbows locked. then nodded in the direction of the nearest homes.??You??re wondering why I needed to talk to you?????It had crossed my mind. She??d heard bits and pieces of this already.